Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Come back. Shots need mouths.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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