The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
stop calling my apartment porn island.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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