Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
Randomize
