i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
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