Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Banned from zoo.
Again?
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
