were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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