kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
