i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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