you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
