Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize