Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
