ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
