I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
