After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
