A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize