im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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