Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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