She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
