dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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