I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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