You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
