yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
