College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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