Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
