guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize