Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize