I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
