no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
