I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
