I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
