Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
