She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
