I am puke
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
this hospital has no fireball
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
