the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize