Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
No subtext here. People are naked.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Randomize
