You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
