how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize