I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize