Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
