Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
