Grow some girl-balls and come out already
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Randomize
