What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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