didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize