so explain again why im purple
no
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
someone owes me an orgasm
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
