I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
