You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
This is the high leading the old right now
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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