Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Randomize
