What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize