Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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