Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
