My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Boobs speak an international language.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
