he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
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