I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Actions speak louder than pants.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Randomize